


Our path to survival

by FuckYeahChilton



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Alternate Universe- Different Alliances, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Desus - Freeform, Falling In Love, I won't spoil too much in the tags, M/M, Slow Build, Survival, The Walking Dead Universe, darus - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-09
Updated: 2018-01-21
Packaged: 2019-01-31 05:18:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 16,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12675177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FuckYeahChilton/pseuds/FuckYeahChilton
Summary: Everyone is the same. The way they meet is different. Will it change who they become? Which side they fight for? In a world ruled by the dead, you need to find something that keeps you going. Or someone..





	1. Day 137

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to my new little project =) (no worries I still keep writing Blind Date X3) But I needed something in the TWD universe just with a new point of view so I thought I throw all characters into shuffle and see what happens =)

 

 

 

 

 

*** Chapter 1 ***

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It was a hot summer day, out on the road near Atlanta, Georgia. Too hot to run without having water or even a destination. Still, the guy named Daryl Dixon was running. Not for his own life, but his brother's. It was day 137, since the living dead started ruling the world. Feeling dizzy, Daryl stopped to catch a breath. Sweat was running from his forehead into his eyes, blurring his vision. He blinked and blocked the sun from shining into his face with his hand. In the distance, he spotted a truck and after walking a bit up the road, he saw someone crouching next to it, changing the front tire.

The guy in the greenish leather coat wasn't looking very strong; at least not too strong for Daryl to handle. He wouldn't waste time on a truck that size, if it wasn't for what was probably inside. Whatever it was, it was probably useful.  
“Jackpot.” Daryl mumbled and moved away from the road to get closer without being seen. He usually appeared loud and quick-tempered, but if he had to, he was able to move as silently as a cat.  
The stranger was so focused on checking if he got his hands dirty, he wasn't even hearing Daryl coming when he was right behind him. What jerk was wearing gloves, a coat and a knitted beanie on a hot day like that anyway. 

Daryl attacked fast, with a choke-grip, pointing a knife to the guy's head. It had to be a clean stab into the brain or otherwise, the guy would wake up, transformed into a living dead. Daryl had never killed a human before, though. He once saw one dying, not by a bite, but because of an accident and he turned anyway.  
The stranger raised his arms and said: “Whatever you want, we can talk about it..” his voice was annoyingly soft and Daryl snarled: “Nah, I don't think so..”  
“I really don't wanna hurt you...”  
Daryl snorted. “You always make threats you can't keep?”  
“No.. not really..” the guy replied and before Daryl was able to react, he was disarmed and on the ground, his wrists pinned to the ground left and right next to his face.  
“Hi. Can we talk now?” the guy said with a satisfied smirk.  
“Fine..” Daryl growled eventually and the guy released his arms. He pretended to just get up, with his hands in the air, but decided to give it another try and tackled the guy to the ground. Within the blink of an eye, he was the one on his back with his wrists pinned to the ground again.  
“Again. I really don't wanna hurt you. You wanna tell me what happened? Are _you_ hurt?” the guy kept asking, now noticing the blood on Daryl's hands.  
“No. My brother... He got bitten.. I chopped off his hand, I need meds and bandages, you got somethin' like that in there?” Daryl blinked against the sun and licked over his dry lips.  
“Better. I have a camp with a real doctor. I'll take you there!” the stranger said and got up, offering Daryl a hand. “I'm Paul.”  
Daryl took his hand and Paul helped him to get back on his feet. “Daryl. Ain't got no time to waste, c'mon!” he said and hurried to the front of the truck.  
Paul followed him and they both climbed inside. “You lead the way, I drive. Here. You look like you need it.” With that said, he threw a bottle of water into Daryl's lap. He looked at the bottle like it was the most precious thing he had seen in decades. It was still sealed, clear like a diamond. Daryl opened the bottle in a haste and spilled a bit of water over his face before he exed it.  
Paul smiled at him. “Yeah.. you definitely needed it.”  
Daryl wiped over his mouth and pointed up the road. “That way.” he said a little bit out of breath and Paul started the engine.  
“What happened? You don't look like someone having trouble to survive out here..” Paul said, just to keep the conversation going. Daryl shrugged and looked out of the window. “We ran outta fuel.. tried to get some at a gas station and got attacked. When you get bitten, it takes a while for the virus to spread. We figured that much.. so I chopped off his hand.”  
“You think it's a virus?” Paul asked and Daryl shrugged. “What else could it be?”  
“At least no one I met so far seems to know for sure, that's what I figured out.”  
“Your camp… is it safe?” Daryl asked and Paul shrugged. “More or less. We started building a wall but it is all very provisional for now. We have guards who keep watch over night, we switch. We’re low on provisions and weapons so I’m out most of the time, looking for supplies, medicine, other survivors.. We on the living side, we got to stick together, right?” Paul asked and looked over to Daryl, who was studying his fingernails. “I guess..” he mumbled.  
“Hey, we’ll do everything to help your brother, okay?”  
Daryl had no idea why, but he believed this stranger. He had no other option but having faith in his words anyway. Merle would die without treatment. He would bleed to death or his wound would get infected in the heat.  
“Why are you helping me?”  
Paul huffed softly. “I guess I’m just one of those weirdos who think helping people is a good thing.”  
Before Daryl could reply something, they reached the crossroad, leading to the gas station and Daryl tabbed against the window. “There. Turn right, we’re almost there!”  
Paul did as he was told and could already see the abandoned gas station in the distance. Daryl jumped out of the truck even before Paul had fully stopped and hurried to the place where his brother was waiting. Merle was hiding in a spot with enough shadow to not be fully exposed to the burning sun, holding his arm. The shirt they had wrapped around the stump was soaked with blood, Merle's face was pale, like a ghost. He looked up to his brother tiredly. “Should've left me the knife. How am I supposed to defend myself with one hand and a damn crossbow, hm?”  
“You still alive aren't ya? I brought help. We'll get you to a camp with a doctor. Play nice.”  
“You bet I play nice if it keeps me alive, lil brother.” Merle said with a dirty smile and Daryl helped him to get up. “Paul!” he yelled, “Can you get the bike ready while I get this into the truck?”  
“Sure.” Paul nodded and hurried to the bike. A gas can was already waiting next to it and he assumed the brothers got attacked before they were able to get the bike ready. Paul took the can, then he froze and frowned. There was an SS-sign on the side of the bike and though he had a good feeling about Daryl, he wasn't so sure about his brother. “Axel won't like this...” he mumbled to himself but had no intention to change his plan to help them. Daryl was coming back and picked up his crossbow. “He passed out.. is it far?”  
“About...45 minutes?” Paul guessed.  
“Do we need this?” Daryl kept asking and held up his brother's hand.  
“We have a doctor, not a voodoo-shop and I doubt we can save the hand without ice..and hospital..”  
“Hn.. I keep it anyway. Just in case.” Daryl decided and wrapped it into his bandana before he stuffed it in his backpack, which he stored away under the seat.  
“In case of what? Keeping it as a trophy?” Paul asked semi-seriously and Daryl shrugged. “Who knows... Maybe he wants to wear it around his neck and then I'm the one heading back here to get it. Let's go. You lead the way.” Daryl said and climbed on the bike. Paul nodded and hurried back to the truck. Daryl waited until the truck started moving and followed it all the way to a place that was well hidden in the woods. A path had been cleared, so that cars were able to drive until they met the walls. Paul was right. It was not really a fortress, more a work in progress thing. Two guards were waiting at the front gate, holding spears in their hands, made of branches. Paul gave a sign with his hand and they let him pass but not without giving Daryl a suspicious look when he followed the truck.  
Paul jumped out of the truck and yelled: “GET LUKE!”  
A few people started spreading into different directions and Daryl stumbled to the truck, not even caring that the bike fell over. He helped Paul to get Merle out and they both stabilized him.  
The man called Luke was there in less than a few minutes, carrying a blanket and a first aid kid. Daryl guessed he was in his late thirties. He had dark brown hair that was a bit tousled, with a few strands of gray in them. His features were soft and he had wrinkles around his light brown eyes, making them look friendly. Of course Daryl wasn't expecting someone in a white tunic with a stethoscope around his neck, but maybe not someone in ripped jeans, wearing a Metallica T-Shirt either.  
Luke spread out the blanket and helped to put Merle down. “What happened? Did he get bitten?” he asked calmly, while he unwrapped the wound and started to clean it.  
“Yeah. I chopped of his hand right away so it won't spread. He lost a lot of blood, though.” Daryl explained and Luke nodded. “I have to seal the wound. It's good that he passed out. He won't feel a thing.”  
“He'll make it, right? He's my brother...He...”  
“You're lucky Paul found you. We'll do the best we can. Come on, help me get him to my tent.” Luke smiled and Daryl nodded.  
Together, they carried Merle to one of the many tents inside the camp, where a woman had just finished preparing a cot. “You can wait outside, you did all you could! Get some rest.” Luke said and Daryl nodded, noticing that he had lost Paul along the way and started to walk around, looking for him. He just needed to thank him for the help.  
After a while, he spotted him in the shadows of a tree, arguing with a man and decided to eavesdrop a bit because he knew nothing about this place and the people after all.  
“What the hell were you thinking? You brought some redneck Nazis in here, Paul, this is a peaceful place and you were supposed to recruit good people, useful people!”  
“They needed help! And who says they won't be useful? They survived so far, I'm sure they come with some useful skill set.”  
“They look like trouble and I want them out!”  
“Axel! All slates wiped clean, right? Your words! Wherever they come from, they deserve a chance and we could use some more skilled fighters. We defend this camp with self-made spears, Daryl has a crossbow, they have a bike, his brother wears military tags, we need people like them!”  
“Daryl, huh? You always had a thing for rugged fuckers like him. All dirty and sweaty and messy hair and those arms...” Axel spat and Paul snorted. “Is that why you want them out? Are you serious?”  
“I know you were about to break up with me before all this. Don't pretend you weren't.”  
“I didn't, that's what matters, right? Couples have ups and downs and they part or they grow, I had the hope we would grow. Your jealousy is ridiculous! He's not even my type, I don't know where you got the idea...”  
Daryl moved a bit away because that really was none of his business. He waited by a tent and when Paul walked by, heading to the doctor's tent, he hold him back. “Hey..”  
Paul stopped and looked at him, his features tense and his eyes blurry.  
“I just... thank you. Merle has a real chance ‘cause of you. Look, as soon as he got better, we're outta here.”  
“Don't be ridiculous.. we have a lot of free tents and we need people like you.. Let me guess, you're a good hunter?” Paul smiled weakly.  
Daryl shrugged. “Maybe.”  
“At least, give this place a chance.”  
Daryl was biting his lower lip and looked up, right into Paul's pale-green eyes. He usually avoided eye-contact, but usually people weren't telling him he was useful. No one ever needed him and no one ever fought for him like Paul just did without even knowing him.  
“We could stay for a while, I guess..”

 

 

***

 

 


	2. It is what it is

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little more insight =)

 

 

 

 

***Chapter 2***

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Axel, this is Daryl.” Paul introduced the newcomer to his partner and leader of the camp. He didn't look very happy, but offered Daryl a handshake anyway.  
“Axel Monroe. Welcome to Camp Hope.”  
“Fancy name.” Daryl mumbled with a cigarette between his lips. He lit it and looked at Axel's hand. “Daryl Dixon. My brother's Merle.”  
“Daryl and Merle. If that doesn't sound nice.” Axel said and pulled his hand back.  
“Axel..” Paul hissed and shot him a look. “They've obviously been through a lot. Cut him some slack.”  
“Fine. I'll be honest, we won't accept racists or homophobes here and you two look like both.”  
“Don't know 'bout you, man... but all I see is the living or the dead. That good enough for you?” Daryl asked.

“What about your brother?”

“If your doc saves his ass, he'll probably behave. We're both tired of running. Would be nice to have a place to stay for a while.”  
“Daryl can hunt. You know we're low on food, we need a plan to get through the winter and we could start to produce some kind of beef jerky or something like that now, save up, we would have a better chance and we don't have a skilled hunter, you know that.”  
“Okay, fine. They can stay but if they don't behave, they're out!”  
“They'll behave.” Paul said and looked at Daryl. “Come on, I'll show you the tents, there are a few left to pick from.” he said and escorted Daryl away from his significant other.

“I'll pick the one that's most far away from your sweetheart. No offense, but he's a bit of a pain in the ass.”  
Paul sighed: “Who can blame him.. This world is so messed up. He's just terrified.”  
“You seem pretty zen, though.” Daryl said and Paul smiled. “It is what it is now, right? We have to deal with it somehow.”  
“Right. So you started this camp?”  
“Axel, Becky and me. She's the one helping Luke, Axel's younger sister. We started this place together with one little tent but soon, I found more survivors. The trees keep most of the dead away, but if one is coming through, we will hear it soon enough before it gets to the walls. You see, here's still a lot of work to do but still better than nothing. I'm glad I found you. If you're willing to contribute to this place, you will be a great help.”  
“I found you.”Daryl mocked and Paul looked at him with a little spark in his eyes. “I already saw you when you were running up the road, before you started sneaking around.”  
“Shut up.” Daryl looked to the ground and Paul laughed. “This is mine,” he said and pointed to a tent. I have my own place, mostly because sometimes I come home in the middle of the night and don't want to wake anyone up. Also it gets tough, being so close to everyone, everyday.”  
Daryl nodded. “I'll take this.” he decided and opened the door to the tent next to Paul's. Beside the cot, with a sleeping bag on it that was rolled together, it was empty.  
“Feel free to make yourself at home.” Paul said and Daryl dropped his backpack and crossbow. “Thanks.” 

“When was the last time you ate something?”

Daryl shrugged. “Had squirrel 'bout two days ago.”  
Paul smiled, “I get you something. With everything from the truck we should be fine for a while but we need to find more food reserves and save up for the winter. And we need other stuff as well. Blankets, warm clothes, maybe find a safe place where we can stay if it gets too cold.. Actual weapons..”  
“Hmh.. Sounds good. Better start now before it's too late, huh?”  
“Yeah. But you get some rest first.”  
“Nah, I'm good. Get me somethin' to eat and then I'll help you unload the truck. We could take it for a supply run tomorrow.” Daryl suggested and Paul nodded, still smiling.  
“What?”  
“Nothing. Just happy that I wasn't wrong about you.”  
Daryl frowned and looked to the ground. “Was useless long enough.. Time to start building up some shit, I guess.”  
Paul laid his hand on Daryl's shoulder and Daryl flinched, taking a step back.  
The smile on Paul's face vanished and he took a step back himself with a little nod. “I'll be right back.” he said and vanished.

Daryl was still staring at his feet, biting his lower lip. Just when he thought Paul was gone long enough, he dared to look after him. Daryl wanted to punch himself in the face because that was exactly how homophobes would react, right? He was confused, because he actually cared what Paul thought of him. Usually he gave a fuck, but Paul was kind. Paul smiled a lot and he somehow managed to make Daryl feel comfortable. That kind touch came without warning and Daryl reacted like he was used to. 

“Shit..”

He really wanted to give this place a shot. Traveling around with his brother led to nothing and now he had a chance for a fresh start. No one knew him and the world they used to know was gone. This was something else and he was actually useful in whatever this was. He wanted to be useful. For once in his life.

Before Daryl was able to keep riding on his train of thoughts, Paul returned with a bunch of food cans in his arms. “Beans, tuna, some can fruits... I got you an extra can beans because I thought you might need it..” Paul said and placed everything on the ground, together with a fresh bottle of water. He pushed a strand of his dirty-blonde hair behind his ear and faked a smile. “Take your time. If you need anything, I won't be far.”

Daryl nodded. He wanted to say something to make clear that he wasn’t disgusted by the touch of a gay man, but while he tried to find the right words to explain, Paul left and Daryl made no attempts to go after him. He had never been good with words anyway and his stomach complained loudly, with the opportunity to eat right in front of him.  
He grabbed the can opener and started with the beans. It felt like the best thing he ever ate though it probably tasted like shit but compared to what he recently had and even before, he ate way worse sometimes. The tuna was a bit better and the moment he tried the first peach from the fruit can, he was in heaven. Having a mix of something fresh and sweet on his tongue was so good that a little moan escaped his throat. He emptied every can to the last bit and drank half of the water before he got up to check on his brother. 

Half way to the doctor’s tent, the girl who Paul said was Becky, Axel’s sister, walked up to him with a smile. “Daryl, right?” she said and he stopped. “Yeah. How’s my brother?”  
“Luke stopped the bleeding and sealed the wound. We are waiting for him to wake up, he lost a lot of blood and will need a lot of rest to recover, but we are optimistic that he will be okay.”  
“That’s good news. Thanks.”  
“You can go check on him anytime. Luke will stay with him until he’s stable so you can get some rest as well.” Becky smiled. Daryl tried to smile back but it wasn’t more than a twitch of the left corner of his mouth. He just wasn’t used to interact with kind people. 

Daryl kept walking, heading to the truck, assuming Paul would be there. He had offered his help earlier and he needed to keep his mind busy but when he reached the place, there was Axel, helping Paul to unload already. Daryl hesitated for a moment, then he joined them anyway.  
“Hey. Need a hand?” he asked and the way Axel looked at him answered the question without doubt. He wanted him gone.

“Yeah.” Paul said, “We sort the food there, meds over there and anything else right here.”  
Daryl nodded and grabbed a box but Axel stopped him. “We’re good. You can go hunt if you want to make yourself useful. That’s what we kept you for, right?”  
“Axel, give him a break! And stop being an ass, he’s just trying to help.” Paul interrupted and Axel snorted. “And I just told him how.”  
“Daryl..you don’t have to..” Paul started, but Daryl dropped the box. “I’m good.” he snarled quietly, peering hard at Axel, then he lit a cigarette and left. 

Paul crossed his arms in front of his chest and looked at his partner. “What?” Axel asked and kept unloading the truck. “Was that really necessary?” Paul returned the question and Axel sighed. “Probably not. I just want to keep scum out of this place. We worked hard to make this camp become something. We are a little community and yes, I want the Dixon-brothers out because they don’t seem to be trustworthy people. I know you want to help everyone and I love you for what you are, but this is the next world and you have to keep your eyes open.”  
“My eyes are open.” Paul replied dryly. “Daryl wants to help and his brother isn’t even awake, yet. Still you’re judging both of them.”

Axel put down the box he was carrying and wrapped his arms around Paul. “I’m just trying to protect my family, okay.. You know that..” he whispered into his hair and Paul closed his eyes, breathing in the scent of the man he once fell in love with. That was long ago.. He knew this was an illusion and still, it was the only thing that felt real in this nightmare. Axel was right, he wanted to leave him before all this happened, before the dead started walking, but now he was the only thing left. Axel and Becky.. His family. His happy, dysfunctional family…  
“I miss you..” Axel mumbled but Paul said nothing. He was a terrible liar, always had been, so he just waited until Axel was willing to release him.

“We’ve got work to do..” Paul mumbled and kept unloading the truck. He was frustrated because he had been looking forward to do this with Daryl. He wanted to get to know him better because it would make people feel safer, if he could vouch for him. It felt good to talk to a fresh face. He wanted to find out if Daryl was just playing nice or if he was a good guy for real. He was stuck in this camp with the same people, doing the same things day after day for months now and Daryl Dixon was the most exciting thing he had discovered so far for sure and he wanted to know more.

 

 

***

 

 


	3. Supply run

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I am super slow with writing at the moment but I have so much stuff to do... I hope you forgive me and hopefully enjoy the new chapter =3

 

 

 

 

*** Chapter 3 ***

 

 

 

 

Daryl was sitting by his brother’s side. It was three days now, three days in this camp with all those people who looked at him like he was a threat. It hadn’t been like that from the start. It was Axel. His sister, the doc, Paul.. they were kind to him and Daryl fulfilled his duty as hunter day by day.  
“Can’t you just wake up, man?” Daryl mumbled, not looking at his brother. He wanted to leave, but he couldn’t leave Merle behind on his own, with one hand, surrounded by all these fuckers. 

Daryl heard someone entering the tent and didn’t even have to turn around to know who it was. No one else moved as silent as him. “Hey..” Paul greeted softly and Daryl looked up. “He ain’t waking up..”  
Paul sighed with a weak smile and wanted to lay a hand on Daryl’s shoulder for comfort, then he remembered his first reaction when he did that once and pulled his hand back. Daryl noticed and immediately felt guilty. Paul was always kind to him, even with the piercing looks of his boyfriend behind his back.  
Daryl watched him filling the glass next to Merle’s bed with blue flowers and snorted. “Spare the effort. He ain’t worth flowers.” he said and Paul looked at him. “Blue inspires strength and calm.. At least that’s what I read somewhere..” 

Daryl said nothing, his eyes locked with Paul’s for a moment before he dropped his gaze, staring at his feet. He couldn’t see that Paul’s eyes were still resting on him. He was quiet for a while, then he said: “You still wanna go on a supply run with me? Sitting here all day won’t make him wake up faster..”  
Daryl looked up again. “You sure you wanna do that? I mean.. Axel..” “I don’t need his permission.” Paul interrupted and crossed his arms in front of his chest. “The truck is empty, there’s a village I want to check out and I could use a helping hand. You coming?”

Daryl was still hesitating. He didn’t want to cause trouble and he knew Axel would freak out about him being alone with Paul. For whatever reason he still stayed with that asshole… “It is because I’m gay, isn’t it? Don’t worry, I won’t rape you, I have a boyfriend.”  
Daryl cocked an eyebrow and stood up. “Looks more like crap from the past to me.” he scoffed and left the tent, followed by Paul. “Who the hell do you think you are? Where are you going?” he called after him and Daryl turned around. “Get the truck ready, I’m getting my crossbow.”  
Paul stopped, his mouth open, but no words came out. He huffed and looked after Daryl with a smile, then he turned around to head to the truck. The last three days, Daryl had been very quiet. Or he was just quiet in general, Paul wasn’t sure about that. Maybe he would find out more today.

He wasn’t waiting for Daryl very long and as soon as he settled on the seat next to him, he started the engine. “Music?” Paul asked with a smile and Daryl shook his head. “Nah..”  
“Bummer. I thought this would be a fun road trip.”  
“This ain’t ‘bout fun. We need to survive, that’s all.” Daryl said and looked out of the window. Paul sighed. “You think I don’t know that? But where’s the point if we stop living.”  
Daryl was quiet for a while, then he looked at Paul. “Maybe it’s just what I’m used to. Did nothing else my whole life.”  
“What did you do before all this?” Paul asked but got no reply. “Come on, I won’t judge and I won’t tell.” Paul said and Daryl was chewing on his fingernails for a moment, then he shrugged. “Nothin’. I was no one. Just a piece of shit, following my brother.”  
Paul decided to leave that without comment. “I’m sorry how they started treating you. It’s because of him.. and that’s because of me. It’ll change, once they start trusting you.” he promised. “Nah. Won’t be there long enough to find out. As soon as Merle’s up, we’re out.”  
Paul felt a dull pain in his chest. It was Daryl who gave him hope that the so called camp would actually turn into a safe place. Beside him, they had no fighters, no one with any survival skills whatsoever, they needed people like Daryl and Merle. “How can I change your mind?” Paul asked, his sad eyes finding Daryl’s. “You can’t.”

Paul knew Daryl was serious now and he chose to not push him into something. He still had time to win Daryl for the camp, so he focused on the road again. “There’s a little mall in the village. I scouted the area, it looks untouched. A bit risky to go in on my own, though.. The area seemed a bit too quiet.. too untouched.. but the mall could be a jackpot.”  
“Hmh. We check out the place. If it’s walkers in there we gotta come back with more people, clear the place and get the stuff.”  
“There’s the problem. We don’t have weapons and no people who know how to use them.” Paul said.  
“Then we find weapons and train ‘em. Merle can do it.” They exchanged a look and Paul smiled. “What?” Daryl asked. “You’re not leaving.” Paul replied and Daryl huffed. “We’ll see..”  
“No you’re not.” Paul said again, still with a satisfied smile on his lips. “There! We’re almost there.” he exclaimed and slowed down the truck. Daryl was looking out of the window, focused on the surroundings. Paul parked the truck close to the warehouse and they both got out, moving closer to the building as quiet as possible. Daryl stopped in front of the windows, giving Paul a sign with his hand to wait. He peeked inside and moved to the entry door quietly, followed by Paul. He gave him another sign and they pushed the door open manually. Though Paul was an experienced scout, he followed Daryl all the way through the deserted building. He knew it was important to let him understand that _he_ was important. That he was needed and taken seriously. Daryl needed a purpose in this world and Paul needed Daryl. More than he was aware of at that point.  
“Need new clothes?” Paul whispered when they passed a fashion store. He thought Daryl would ignore him but he lowered his crossbow and looked inside. “Winter is coming, right?” he said and they entered the store. “Winter collection is not out, yet, I guess..” Paul said, because the store was full of clothes for summer. A leather vest with wings on the back caught Daryl’s attention and he took it. “Mine.” he said and put it on. “Suits you.” Paul said and a little satisfied smile flashed over Daryl’s lips. “Come on..” he said, touching Paul’s arm lightly. “Let’s find some meds and food.”  
Paul nodded and followed him, enjoying to see Daryl ease up a little. He got carried away by enjoying the view of his back as well and caught himself more than once, staring at Daryl’s cute butt instead of paying attention to the surroundings. His heart was beating fast and the spot where Daryl had touched his arm was still burning. Paul couldn’t remember the last time he felt that way, but he felt more alive now than anytime in the past few years with Axel. 

They entered a grocery store and Daryl tried to get a shopping cart that was locked with the others because it made more sense to load it full of stuff instead of carrying everything out with their hands. “Help me get this out.” he said and they were pulling at the chain together, not bothering the noise it made, but it was stuck. “Damn!” Daryl cursed and kicked the cart. “Daryl...” Paul mumbled, because he suddenly heard a groan, then another.. then a buzz of noises coming from all corners around them. “Shit...” Daryl mumbled and they moved closer together, back to back, seeing walkers coming out from everywhere like they had woken up just now. “Let’s get the hell outta here..” Daryl said. “Which way?” Paul asked, holding up his knifes, ready to fight. “There.. we can handle those few, right?” “Sure..”  
Without waiting any longer, they rushed through the walkers, beating them up as good as possible, but it was difficult for Daryl, because he ran out of arrows fast and had no time to pick all up. “Gimme a knife!” he yelled and Paul threw one over, while he was fighting the walkers like he was the reincarnation of Bruce Lee. “It’s too many of ‘em! We gotta find another way!” Daryl yelled and Paul grabbed his wrist. “Run!” he yelled and pulled Daryl along, pushing the walkers aside. They headed up a non functional escalator, through a random store into a storage room and locked the door. The one walker waiting inside was done with one stab in his brain and both men dropped on the ground, breathing heavily. 

“You’re a damn good fighter.” Daryl said and Paul nodded. “Thanks. What now?” 

“Now we’re screwed..”

"At least you got a cool vest."

"Yeah.."

 

 

***

 

 


	4. The little things

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have another chapter before I need to sleep. I hope you enjoy =)

 

 

 

 

 

*** Chapter 4 ***

 

 

 

 

 

Daryl was checking every corner of the room, while Paul had his ear pressed against the door.  
“No chance. That’s the only way out.” he said and Paul moved away from the door. “And biters still out there.. You think they move on if we just wait long enough?” he asked and looked at Daryl, who shrugged. “We left the door open… but if they get out we have to deal with ‘em here and outside..”

“So either way, we have to fight our way through them..” Paul said while Daryl walked up and down like a trapped animal. He stopped and looked down to the dead walker, knelt down next to it, took the knife out and started to slit it open.

“Daryl… what the hell are you doing?”

“Camouflage.” Daryl simply said and started to rip out the guts and covered his clothes with them.

“Oh come on, at least take off your new vest first...” Paul said with a chuckle. “Do you know if this works?” “Nah.. I’ll try it. You’ll stay here and if it works, you follow.” Daryl ordered and Paul joined him. “Don’t be ridiculous. We’re in this together.”  
Daryl looked up with a mischievous smile. “Fine.” He threw some guts at Paul, who almost jumped up. “Not in my beard, you prick!” he yelled, picked up some guts as well and started a revenge attack. Daryl laughed and smeared a good portion of bloody mess all over Paul’s coat. “This is so disgusting.” Paul laughed, “You’re the most disgusting person I ever met!” “Hey.. what’s the point in surviving if we don’t live.” Daryl chuckled and they kept throwing guts at each other. “Now this is funny to you? I had to stand your grumpy face for three days and now you can laugh!” “Hey, we might die, let me at least have some fun going down.”

Paul stopped and his smile vanished. “This has to work…” he said quietly and Daryl nodded. “It gotta… I don’t wanna smell like shit for nothin’.” “We just have to make it to the truck.” Paul said, stood up and offered Daryl a hand. Daryl allowed him to help him up and they exchanged an intense look. “Let’s do this.”

They opened the door and let the walkers rush in, while they just stood still, looking at each other.  
When they realized that nothing happened, Daryl gave Paul a sign with a short nod and they started moving with the crowd. Both of them never got a chance to look at the dead walking so closely before. Paul wasn’t able to look too close, because then he would see more like the one with a fast food restaurant uniform, the one with the ripped college jacket, one wearing a sash with the letters “Birthday Girl” written on it. They’ve all been human beings once, ripped out of their lives.. Maybe they’d shut down the mall when the virus was spreading and just left everyone in here to die..  
Paul almost lost Daryl from his sight and grabbed his hand, so they wouldn’t be separated. He squeezed it lightly and Daryl squeezed back. It was ridiculous how he was in the middle of a herd of dead people walking, covered in human guts and still, this was the best date he had in years.  
They reached the entrance and the parking lot was full of walkers as well. To the truck… Make it to the truck.. 

Not one of the walkers paid attention to Paul and Daryl, until they reached the truck and had to open the doors to climb in. The unusual sound and movement attracted the attention of the dead and the herd immediately started to surround the truck. “Drive!” Daryl said and Paul started the engine with shaky hands. “I don’t know if that was the worst or best experience of my whole life, but I know I want sex with you right now.” Paul said and Daryl looked at him with a baffled expression. “I pretend you didn’t say that, now drive!”  
Paul hit the gas and the car dashed backwards to get some space, then he pushed forward through the herd, but some of the walkers hurled against the window. “Damn.. I can’t see!” Paul cursed. “Just keep drivin’! We gotta get out of this mess!” Daryl said and Paul just drove, trying not to look into the rotting face of the walker in front of him. “Can’t ya try to shake it off?” Daryl asked impatiently. “I’m driving a damn truck!” Paul argued back and Daryl grabbed the wheel. “Hey, what..” Paul protested and fought with Daryl over the control of the vehicle. Daryl’s rough maneuvering succeeded in getting the walkers off the window, but as soon as they had their clear view back, they realized they were heading straight into a lake. “FUCK!” Daryl yelled but it was too late. The truck started drowning immediately and water was pouring inside. “Help me open the door!” Paul yelled, but the water blocked both doors. “Safe your breath.” Daryl yelled back before they were fully surrounded by water and opened the window instead. The lake wasn’t that deep, but deep enough to be a serious danger and the truck already hit the ground. Daryl held his breath and managed to get out through the window, which wasn’t that easy considering he still had his crossbow shouldered, but he wasn’t going up right away, he turned around and helped Paul out, who seemed to panic. He grabbed him by the collar, pulled him out of the truck and didn’t let go all the way up. 

Daryl gasped for air the moment he breached the surface and looked around hastily to get back his orientation. Paul was unconscious and Daryl knew he had to get him out of the water. He spotted a safe place at the lakeside, surrounded by bushes and brought Paul there.  
“Hey… wake up..” Daryl mumbled breathlessly, but Paul wasn’t breathing. “C’mon, man.. don’t do this to me..” he mumbled and started with cardiac massage and mouth-to-mouth respiration without even thinking about it. Adrenalin was rushing through his veins, caused by the pure fear of losing the one good guy in his life. Daryl repeated the process five times, but Paul wasn’t reacting. “Damn, you’re a fighter! Wake up!” Daryl’s voice broke and he thrashed Paul’s chest with his fist, causing him to finally release all the water from his lounges. He coughed and gasped and a wave of relief rushed over Daryl, almost causing him to faint. He helped Paul to sit up, rubbing his back for comfort. “It’s alright.. you’re okay..” he said softly and waited for his companion to calm down.

“That… was close..” Paul said breathlessly and swallowed. He looked at Daryl and stroke a wet strand of hair out of his face. This time, he didn’t flinch and he wasn’t breaking the eye contact. Paul wasn’t sure if he saw a trace of tears on Daryl’s cheeks or if it was just water, but he chose to not mention it. “You saved my life..” he said instead.  
“You got brain in your beard..” Daryl replied after a moment of silence and picked the walker leftovers out the other man’s face. Paul smiled. “You still got biter all over you..” he replied and closed his eyes for a moment to collect himself, then he started to undress. “Whatcha doin’ now?” Daryl asked and Paul raised an eyebrow. “Trying to safe my clothes. You should do the same if you wanna keep them.” 

Daryl watched Paul strip down to his underwear and start to wash out the dirt off his clothes. He wasn’t even noticing how he couldn’t take his eyes off that beautiful body. He was small but well trained, all muscled in the right place and the way they tensed and relaxed while he was trying to rub the blood out of the fabric of his shirt blurred Daryl’s mind. He felt all his blood rushing down to his pants and forced himself to look away before he wouldn’t be able to stop his erection from growing anymore. He thought back to the day his dad found pictures of naked dudes, jerking each other off, under his bed and beat the shit out of him afterwards. The painful memory helped to clear his head and he took off his clothes as well, before Paul was able to notice something.  
About half an hour passed until all pieces were more or less clean and spread out in the sun to dry. Daryl and Paul were sitting next to each other, watching the water sparkle in the sun. The noises of the dead faded after a while and for now, the world was at peace.

“I like the silence..” Paul said and Daryl agreed with a hum. “Maybe that’s why I’m out on my own so often… to feel the silence..”  
“When I lived in the mountains, I was out on my own a lot. I get ya.” Daryl said and flipped a stone over the water surface.  
“That’s the only good thing about the new world. It’s quiet and we don’t waste our time with pointless stuff anymore.. Now we have time to appreciate the little things that make this world so beautiful. Like the water, glistening in the sun…” Paul smiled and dropped his gaze. “I talk to much, don’t I?” he asked with a soft chuckle and Daryl shook his head. “You don’t talk much..” Paul pointed out. Daryl shrugged. “I know we just met but.. I like you. I hope one day you’ll be able to trust me.”

Daryl looked at Paul for a while, biting his lower lip.

“I trust you.”

 

 

***

 

 


	5. Camp Hope

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before I need to sleep, have a little new chapter =) I hope you like it! <3

 

 

 

 

***Chapter 5***

 

 

 

 

 

It took about two hours until the clothes had dried in the sun and Daryl got up first to get dressed.  
Paul had his arms wrapped around his legs, his head resting on his knees and watched Daryl. It was impossible to not see the thick scars on his back and no matter how he got them, Paul wondered if that had been the reason why he flinched the first time he had touched his shoulder. The whole day, Daryl never showed any signs of feeling uncomfortable because he had gay company. Maybe his first intention had been right and the second entirely wrong.. Now Daryl’s whole body language had changed. He seemed more relaxed, like all they had been through on their failed supply run brought them closer together. He said he trusted him and thought Paul knew Daryl for just a few days, he trusted him as well and not only because he had saved his life twice so far. It was a gut feeling and usually Paul could always trust his own intuition. 

“Hey, sugar. Stop daydreamin’ and get dressed. We should head back before it gets dark.” Daryl interrupted Paul’s train of thoughts and threw his clothes on him. “Thanks, snickerdoodle..” Paul replied and Daryl shot him a look. “What? I thought we do that now?” he smiled and a little smirk flashed over Daryl’s lips. Was he actually accidentally starting to flirt? He never did that before, but under different circumstances, in a different universe, Paul would be a guy he would want to take out for a date. In his own personal hell he had called home, he never got the chance to even think into that direction. Maybe if the right guy would have crossed his path, he would have given it a shot, but it never happened and Daryl had no hope left to ever find love. He knew it wouldn’t happen in this world, not even in a camp called ‘hope’, but he could still enjoy a nice guy’s company, right? Paul was full of surprises. He knew he was strong, he already proved it when they first met, but seeing him fighting walkers was a whole different story. He had amazing fighting skills, a strong stomach and an appealing sense of humor. Daryl liked him. Paul belonging to someone else wasn’t enough to hold him back developing those feelings.

Paul was back in gear and looked over the lake a last time. “I can’t believe we lost the damn truck..”

“We’re still alive.” Daryl replied and strapped his crossbow on. “C’mon.”

Paul followed Daryl back to the road. The herd had moved on and the area looked clear. “We should get back to that mall with more people and weapons. Clear the place and get the stuff.” Daryl said and Paul nodded. “There’s another place I have an eye on. We might be able to find weapons there. Wanna check out tomorrow?” He asked with a grin and Daryl nodded. “Sure!”

When Daryl and Paul arrived at the camp, it was dark already. Axel was waiting by the gate, worry written all over his face when he saw his boyfriend returning, but the moment he spotted Daryl next to him, his face darkened. His hope Daryl would have gone hunting and got killed in the woods died and he had to face the reality, that he had been out with Paul the whole day.

“We lost the truck.” Paul said instead of greeting and Axel crossed his arms in front of his chest. “How?”  
“Long story short, we got overrun by a herd.. and ended up in a lake.. But we checked out the mall I told you about and.. “  
“Shut up. I give a damn about your mall. I told you not to take _him_ with you.” Axel spat and nodded into Daryl’s direction. “Daryl saved my life twice today. If I mean anything to you, you should thank him.” Paul said dryly. “So that you can keep avoiding being close to me? When was the last time you slept in my tent, huh?” Axel asked.  
“I told you I needed time and you promised to give me space. Now you act like an obsessive jerk! We’ve been there before, remember?” Paul returned the question, trying to keep his voice calm.

“Don’t talk to me like that!” Axel yelled and raised his hand but Daryl stepped between them, grabbing his wrist. “Enough.” he growled, but Paul laid his hand on Daryl’s arm. “Don’t. I got this.” he said softly and Daryl looked at Paul, who locked eyes with him and he understood. He had to handle the situation on his own and he would. “I go sleep.” Daryl said and Paul nodded. “Good night. And thank you, again.”  
“Was nothin’.” Daryl mumbled and left the two alone, trying to ignore the sharp pain in his chest. Now he wished he was back in the mall, trapped with Paul.. He wanted to take him back to the lake where time seemed to stand still and it felt like they were alone in this world. Paul wasn’t happy, it was not difficult to see that. Daryl somehow felt the need to change that, but he knew he wasn’t the one who could. Paul obviously haven’t given up on his relationship, yet. He had to respect that.

Back in his tent, Daryl dropped the crossbow and kicked it. He looked for a cigarette, lit it and threw himself on his cot with so much force, it almost broke. Daryl wanted to leave more than ever as much as he didn’t want to leave at all.  
He calmed down a little while finishing the cigarette and got up to check on his brother. Now he wished Merle wouldn’t be the dick he always had been. He had stopped wishing for a real brother he could talk to long ago. Someone who loved him just the way he was…  
Becky was sitting by Merle’s side, reading from a book. She looked up when Daryl entered the tent and smiled. She looked tired.

“Ya don’t have to waste your time here..” Daryl said, “He ain’t worth it.”

“Why are you trying to save him then?” Becky asked and folded the corner of the page before she closed the book.  
“He’s blood.” Daryl said and pulled a chair next to her. “The only family I got.”  
“Clinging to toxic people just because they’re what you’re used to isn’t always a good decision...”  
Daryl tilted his head. “Is it at all?”  
“You tell me.” she smiled and Daryl huffed. “You can go if you want.. I’ll stay here for a while..”  
“Oh, it doesn’t bother me. I like to have something to do. Taking care of him takes my mind off of things..”  
“He’d like that. He likes cute girls. Cute girls usually don’t like him, though.”  
Becky laughed. “Thanks for the compliment. Do you like cute girls?”  
Daryl was quiet for a moment. “Hmh...sure..” he said eventually. It was better she thought he would, than getting the idea he could like Paul. She was Axel’s sister and he didn’t want to cause any more trouble between them. If Axel would stop seeing him as a threat, maybe he would ease up and not make a drama out of them becoming friends. Daryl never had a real friend and somehow, a little flame of hope awoke inside of him, that Paul could be one.

“Shut your filthy mouth, baby brother.. cute girls love me..”

Becky and Daryl both jumped up at the same time. “Merle! You okay?” Daryl asked and felt more relief for his brother waking up than he had expected. Merle blinked and opened his eyes lazily. “I ain’t dead? Cause I swear I saw Jesus...” he mumbled. “I get Luke!” Becky exclaimed and rushed out of the tent. “Found a guy named Paul. He brought us here. We’re in a camp with a real doctor. You’ll be fine.” Daryl assured and got his brother some water. Merle looked around. “Flowers? You lost your mind or somethin’?”  
“Wasn’t me… There are nice people here so better watch your mouth. They saved your ass. We can stay here, have our own space.. All we gotta do is contribute. I hunt. You can train them with weapons. You in?” Daryl asked before any of the others got a chance to talk to him and helped Merle to drink a bit. “Any better options?” Merle asked weakly and Daryl shook his head. “We start to prepare for Winter. Our chance is better with this group. Then we’ll see. You gotta get used to fight with one hand..”  
“Gotcha, baby brother.” Merle said with a hoarse voice. he might be an ass, but Merle wasn’t stupid and Daryl was optimistic, that he would behave for his own benefit. At least as long as they were depending on the help of the community.

 

 

***

 

 


	6. On hold

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone~  
> This is probably my last chapter for this year, I really hope you enjoy it =)

 

 

 

 

 

 

*** Chapter 6 ***

 

 

 

 

 

 

Daryl was exhausted, but not able to sleep that night. Merle was finally back but still weak. It would take a little longer until he would be back on his feet. He fell asleep again after he ate a bit and Daryl returned to his tent after the doctor said it was okay to leave Merle alone, to get some rest himself. Now he was staring into the darkness, smoking his last cigarette. With each pull, the tent lit up a little and Daryl finally relaxed until he pulled once more and Paul was standing in the middle of the tent, making him almost fall off the cot.

“Damn… What the hell?” Daryl stuttered, his heart beating fast. He almost got a second heart attack when Paul lit a candle, suddenly sitting right in front of him. He haven’t heard him enter or move at all. 

“Hi.” Paul whispered with a smile and Daryl exhaled. Paul gave him a sign to keep quiet and unfolded a paper in front of him. Daryl cocked an eyebrow.   
“It’s the map of the place I wanna go tomorrow.” Paul explained and Daryl looked at the paper with the hand-drawn map. “Here. The store is locked but I think we will find a good bunch of weapons there. How good are you with picking locks?”  
“I ain’t..” Daryl said and they exchanged a look. “Is that what you think of me?” he added and guilt washed over Paul’s beautiful face. “I.. No… I wasn’t thinking at all.. I guess..”   
“Look, I might have done a lot of things but.. I ain’t a criminal.”  
Paul took a deep breath, trying to find the right words. Daryl looked so hurt and that wasn’t his intention at all.  
“Too bad..” Paul sighed and studied the ground. Then he looked up with a mischievous smile. “I hoped you could be my partner in crime..”  
Daryl’s features softened but he looked a bit confused.   
“Sneak out of the camp… fuck shit up.. We’re a good team, Dixon.” Paul winked and Daryl choked back a laugh. “Nice try, asshole..”  
“I mean it. You’re the brain.. I’m the muscle.. we can’t be without each other!” Paul kept trying to get Daryl back on board and this time he couldn’t fight it back and laughed. “I’m the brain and the muscle.. you’re the decoration.” Daryl said and Paul chuckled. “Ouch...Okay, I deserved that one..” “Yeah, you did.”  
“Are we good?”  
“Yeah..”  
Paul smiled and Daryl returned the smile. “You should get some rest. We need it if we maybe almost die again tomorrow.”  
“Yeah..” Paul said quietly and the smile on his face faded. His eyes rested on the map on the ground and he made no attempt to leave.  
“You okay?” Daryl asked.  
“I don’t know..” Paul replied honestly. “I think.. I just don’t wanna be alone tonight..”  
Daryl looked at him for a while, trying to figure out what that meant. Why was he here then and not with his boyfriend? Instead of saying anything, he rolled over and moved to the edge of his cot to make space for his partner in crime. Paul understood the invitation, blew out the candle and joined Daryl. They had to move close together to not fall down due to the lack of space and when Daryl felt the other man’s back against his, his heart was beating faster again. Even through all their clothes, he felt the heat of his body and he knew it was wrong to enjoy it, but Paul was here now and Daryl wouldn’t send him away.  
“Thank you..” Paul whispered into the darkness and Daryl closed his eyes with a smile on his lips. “Shut up.”

***

The next weeks were passing by fast because there was so much to do to prepare the little community for the upcoming winter, there was almost no time for trouble. Axel had calmed down a little bit about Paul taking Daryl with him. Merle’s recovery went well and though Axel, of course, hated him because he decided he hated all Dixons, he managed to fit into the whole picture quite well. What Axel hated most was that Becky had a way to deal with Merle to make him act like an almost decent human being most of the time. He still showed disgust towards everyone who wasn’t white or straight, but more in a mocking way. Not always nice and with a kind of humor most of the campers didn’t like, but they learned to take him just the way he was, because he was a great help to prepare the community for surviving all kinds of situations. As long as he wasn’t causing any real trouble, there was no reason to kick him out.

Daryl and Paul grew closer together with every time they went out to get supplies or explore nearby areas. When they were alone, they joked around a lot, teased each other, flirted, laughed. Daryl loved those times but when they were back at the camp, their behavior changed back to just two people in a friendship-ish relationship, who worked together. It happened five times, that Daryl woke up at night and found Paul next to him, asleep. In the morning, he was gone and they never talked about it. He had accepted the fact that Paul would never see more in him than a friend, but he enjoyed every moment he shared with him alone to the fullest. Paul Rovia was the only real friend he ever had and he wouldn’t risk to lose that, no matter how many butterflies started to rampage in his stomach every time Paul laughed, no matter how fast his heart was beating when he touched him on occasion… Paul was a friend, his partner in crime, nothing more.

It was probably late October, no one was really keeping track of time from the beginning, so they just started to guess at some point. The weather had changed, it was getting colder day by day.   
Daryl just carried a bunch of weapons to their arsenal, while others around him stocked a tent with blankets, sleeping bags, warm clothes and food cans. The mall was clear now and a little paradise of useful stuff, but it wasn’t so easy to get everything to the camp and the camp was too far and too well protected by now to move it closer to the town. They had to go several times and with more people and cars, the journey was a risk all the time. Too much attention could lure walkers to the camp, it almost happened once, but Daryl had used his brother’s bike to lead them away before they got too close. Axel might hate it, but the campers felt more safe with Daryl and Merle around. Sometimes, Daryl took Becky with him and showed her how to track and hunt. Once he learned how good she was with taming animals, he brought out her hidden talent in surviving in the woods. While Merle gave classes on how to use weapons, Paul taught the campers the basic tricks of self defense. Everything was developing well and Axel as the leader of the camp became more and more useless.

Daryl stopped along the way because he saw the so called leader following Paul, who was just on the way back to the cars to bring more stuff inside and grabbed his arm. Daryl knew that Paul had managed to put their relationship issues on hold for the camp’s sake and Axel had agreed. They needed everyone to work together and survival was most important now. Daryl wasn’t sure if he really wanted to save the relationship or just keep Axel quiet, but he never liked how Axel talked to him, how he looked at him and touched him. He wanted to know what they were talking about, but they were too far away.

“Watcha lookin’ at?” Merle suddenly appeared behind him and Daryl almost dropped the guns. His brother looked into the same direction, witnessing how Axel made attempts to touch Paul’s face, take his hand, force a kiss on him, but Paul took a step back, seemingly trying to explain that he wasn’t up for that.

“Never thought fags could grow balls like that. I mean Jesus. He’s kinda tough, hm?” Merle said and Daryl looked at him. “Why not? ‘Cause he’s gay? He could knock us all off.”  
“Yeah. He should start with that fucker Axel. He ain’t good for this place.”  
“He built it.”  
“He started. It’s us building. Make this place safe. First I was thinkin’ we could just collect, then take all we need and get the fuck outta here but..”  
“Where? Don’t look any better outside this camp. There must be more.. More survivors. We should keep lookin’ when we made it through winter. Supplies won’t last forever..” Daryl said and Merle nodded. “This is a good place but useless if we gotta start plant our own food..”  
“Ya think? What if it’s only here and we’re in the middle of a quarantine or somethin’. Maybe we just gotta get outta here and life’s normal everywhere else.”  
“Forgot the news back when TV was still workin’? Was all around the country. When was the last time we saw a helicopter, hm?”  
Daryl bit his lower lip, lost in thoughts for a moment, then he nodded. “Guess you’re right.”  
“Always am, lil’ brother.” 

Daryl huffed and was about to keep walking because the guns started to get heavy, when he saw Axel punching Paul in the face so hard, he stumbled backwards, his hand covering his eye. It must have hit him by surprise because Daryl knew Paul wasn’t an easy target. His hands started to shake and he felt anger rising in his chest. Stunned, he watched Paul running away while Axel let out a scream, holding his hand. He seemed to have underestimated how painful it could be to your hand if you punch someone.  
“Whatcha waitin’ for?” Merle asked and took the guns from his brother. He got used to function with one hand quite well. Daryl blinked at him, not really sure what he just meant.  
“Don’t look at me like that, I ain’t stupid. C’mon. Kick them damn high heels off and grow some balls yourself. It ain’t him he wants, anyway.”  
With that said, Merle walked away, leaving a speechless Daryl behind. Panic crawled through his veins but he swallowed it down and started running. He needed to find Paul.

 

 

***

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I kinda have a weak spot for Merle and I truly believe there is good in him and that he would have changed for the better if he didn't die so... I like writing him not all bad and asshole. I hope you like my version of him as well and I wish you all a fantastic start into 2018 =) <3


	7. A perfect mess

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone~  
> First I want to thank everyone who left a comment, usually I reply to all but I am so busy and need to sleep now so I try to do it next time, just that you know it means the world to me!!! :'3
> 
> I hope you like the new chapter, leave me your thoughts if you like, it always brightens up my day and I might need some positivity to make it through tomorrow X3
> 
> Hopefully see you next time <3

 

 

 

 

 

 

*** Chapter 7 ***

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Daryl found Paul in the woods, crouched with his back against a tree. He could hear him cry and it tore him apart from the inside. His first impulse was just running to him and pull him in his arms, but on the second thought, there was a reason Paul was hiding to cry. He was always so strong, always had a smile and some kind words for everyone, Daryl didn’t want to take this from him. The illusion, that he wasn’t vulnerable at all, but he also didn’t want him to feel like he was all alone in this world with his pain, because he wasn’t.   
Daryl decided to settle down on the other side of the tree and lit a cigarette. Now Paul didn’t even need to look up to know it was him. Knowing that he wasn’t on his own anymore, Paul’s sobbing stopped, but now and then he sniffed and Daryl could hear that he had a hard time to control his breathing. He waited patiently, not saying anything at all, until Paul had calmed down. He heard him take a deep breath and decided that it was time to break the silence.

“You ain’t cryin’ cause he punched you, right?” Daryl asked quietly and it took a moment until he got a reply. “I don’t know...”  
“I know. It’s ‘cause you know you gotta let go and move on. Man, I dunno what you had that makes you stay with that asshole, but it’s long gone..”

“I know..”

Daryl sighed and leaned his head against the tree, closing his eyes. “You really tryin’ to save it?”

“No.. There was a time.. when this whole hell started, I thought it would bring us closer together again.. But he won’t ever change.. He’s worse than ever.. I hate him, but he’s the only thing I have left from the old world.. The only thing that makes me feel real.. About a year ago, I was a barkeeper and my only worry was how to break up with my boyfriend. About two years ago, I was a barkeeper with a healthy relationship. I loved road trips, hiking in the mountains, sports, getting carried away by a good book with a cup of hot cocoa with whipped cream and a shot of Baileys.. I liked listening to the rain, while being huddled up under a soft blanket.. I mean.. how stupid does that sound? All the things that I thought would make me who I am.. Now nothing matters anymore..” Paul’s voice broke and he took a moment to collect his thoughts.

“Bullshit.. We can still make this a life. We got tons of blankets, huddle up somewhere and listen to rain and shit if it makes you happy, just get the fuck away from that asshole.”

“How? We need everyone to work together now and we can’t kick him out. Becky would never let that happen, like you wouldn’t let anyone kick your brother out, though he’s a dick..”

“He’s tryin’, okay? You don’t wanna see him at his worst..” Daryl tried to defend his brother and Paul chuckled. “Yeah, I can see he is. He’s really a great help for everyone, I mean it.”

Daryl wanted to reply something but just in that moment, it started to rain, so he jumped up and walked around the tree. Paul looked at him with huge, sad eyes, making no attempt to get up, so he offered him a hand. “C’mon!”  
Paul let Daryl help him get up and he pulled him along immediately, heading back to the camp. “Daryl! Wait..” Paul stumbled along and Daryl didn’t let go of his hand, all the way to his tent.  
“Sit.” he ordered and Paul did, while Daryl was looking for something. “Found this today.” he said and wrapped Paul into a colorful poncho. “But you can’t keep it ‘cause I like it. Now listen.”  
Paul looked at Daryl, raising an eyebrow, then he understood and smiled. He closed his eyes and listened to the raindrops, hitting the tent and all his sadness and anger slowly faded away. In the woods, he wasn’t even sure if Daryl would give all those little information about him a second thought at all, but here he was, huddled up in kind of a blanket, listening to the rain, feeling at peace. Paul was trying very hard not to fall in love with Daryl Dixon, but he failed. Every time they were out, just the two of them, he failed. Now, realizing once more how sweet he was, once he got to look behind his rough appearance, he failed. Paul was still struggling with opening up for something new and he was sure Daryl wasn’t into guys, but he managed to make him feel alive. With him, he felt real. He would be okay with not finding love in a physical way ever again if he could always be with Daryl. They understood each other without words and it didn’t matter if their feelings for each other weren’t romantic from both sides, Daryl cared for him and that mattered. He listened and never made him feel stupid or worthless.

Daryl knelt down in front of Paul, nudged his knee to get his attention and looked straight into his bright eyes, when he opened them. “You’re bleeding...” he mumbled and carefully pressed a wet cloth against Paul’s eyebrow. “It’s nothing.” Paul mumbled, but allowed his friend to clear the wound.  
“Can I hurt him?” Daryl asked quietly and Paul smiled. “It will hurt him enough when I break up with him.. Once and for all..”  
Daryl’s face lit up for a split second. “You sure?”   
“Absolutely. I should have gone through with it the first time. Nothing had changed for me since then, just the world around me. I am ready to accept the change. I’ll be good on my own.”  
“But you ain’t. I got your back. It don’t look too bad.” Daryl said when he finished cleaning the wound and Paul smiled. “Thanks.”  
“You wanna stay here tonight?”  
Paul licked over his dry lips and dropped his gaze, then he agreed with a short nod. 

That night, Daryl and Paul weren’t sleeping back to back. Daryl had rolled over, having Paul wrapped into his arms for comfort. He was warm and his hair smelled so good… He couldn’t stop thinking about his brother’s words.. Was he implying that Paul wanted _him_? But he wasn’t his type… And he had a billion chances to show him when they were out alone.. They were just joking around from time to time and Daryl never wanted to make Paul feel like he had a problem with him being gay again. He was too scared to tell him they were on the same boat either. They trusted each other blindly, had developed a friendship that was more than Daryl had ever dreamed of, it was way too risky to add romantic feelings to the mix. He was here, holding Paul in his arms and it was good.

“Thank you..” Paul mumbled, squeezing Daryl’s wrist gently. “For what..”  
“What you do here.. it’s much more than I can expect from a friend..” Paul started and Daryl’s heartbeat fastened. Was it so obvious?  
“I mean… I just want you to know that… I am not hitting on you or something.. You’re my friend. I appreciate that you allow me to cuddle up, though..” Paul smiled and Daryl huffed. “Why wouldn’t I? It’s gettin’ colder.. You’re warm.. win-win.”   
Paul chuckled. “Okay, in that case I volunteer as your personal heater.” “And you sure ya ain’t hittin’ on me?” Daryl asked, tickling Paul a little and he squealed. “Hey.. I’m needy for cuddles… you need a heater.. win-win.”  
Daryl snorted. “I don’t cuddle.” “You cuddle right now..” “Yeah, It’s kinda growin’ on me.”  
Paul laughed outright and slapped his hand over his mouth. They needed to be quiet, who knew if Axel was sneaking around, but he wouldn’t dare to storm into Daryl’s tent. He did it once and it almost ended up in a fight and Daryl had made very clear, that if he ever stepped into his space again, he would be dead.  
“Never thought you were a cuddler anyway..” Paul whispered.  
“Hnh...just never tried..”  
“What?” Paul asked and rolled over, now lying face to face with Daryl, their noses almost touching. “Why?”  
Daryl said nothing.  
“I get it… Rough guys like you and your brother don’t do stuff like that, huh?” Paul teased.  
“I ain’t like my brother..”  
“But you pretend to be.. When you’re around him… You’re different when we’re alone..”  
“You’re different when we’re alone.” Daryl countered and Paul huffed with a smile. “You never judge.. that makes it easy..”  
“You ain’t either…” Daryl said and felt his throat tightening, realizing he never had someone like Paul in his life.. Someone who was kind to him, whose touch didn’t hurt because it wasn’t a punch in his face or a brutal whip on his back with a belt.. Paul was warm and smelled good and he was so close and yet so far away..

“Daryl?” Paul asked softly and caressed his cheek after he noticed a change in his breathing and his worries were right, he felt tears and Daryl broke.  
“Hey.. what’s wrong? Did I say something?” Paul kept asking, but he just got a broken sob as reply and pulled Daryl into his arms. “It’s okay… Whatever it is, I got your back..” Paul whispered with a cracked voice and let Daryl cry. It hurt his heart that he didn’t know what to say or do to comfort him, because he had no idea what had caused his wall crumble now..  
They knew each other for a good while and Daryl never said much about his past but it must have been hell… He wanted to take the pain away, wanted him to feel nothing but love and before he even knew what he was doing, his lips were on Daryl’s, who held his breath immediately, his whole body stiffened, but Paul just kept kissing him and to his own surprise, after a while, Daryl relaxed and returned the kisses hesitantly. From that moment, his mind turned blank and all he felt was Daryl. How his hands suddenly slipped under his shirt, carefully exploring his body. Was this real or was he asleep and dreaming all this? Whatever it was, Paul wanted it to never end. His body and soul were aching for this gentle appreciation, it has been way too long. Neither of them dared to say a word or even make a sound. Curious hands were exploring, clothes dropped on the ground one piece after another.  
Paul pulled Daryl on top of him and wrapped his legs around him to make clear what he wanted. His heart was pounding hard in his chest because usually, he never gave up control but this was Daryl and he wanted to give him all. Paul felt how nervous he was, Daryl was barely breathing between the kisses, his hands were shaky, his heart beating so fast against Paul’s chest… He was sure Daryl had never slept with a man before, so he led him until he seemed to gain a bit confidence on his own and from that moment, Paul allowed himself to get carried away in the sensation of being with the man he secretly adored so much that it was eating him up from the inside, day by day a little more. Now, in that moment, they became one and it was perfect.

Paul was still awake long after Daryl had fallen asleep in his arms. It took a while until Daryl calmed down, until his body stopped trembling and his breathing returned to a regular pace. Paul was stroking his back, breathing little kisses on his shoulders, until he finally dozed off. Now he was snoring, but just a little bit and it made Paul smile. They haven’t spoken a word at all, but it was okay. No matter how this happened or what would be tomorrow, now everything was perfect.

 

 

***

 

 


	8. Final Stroke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just quickly before I have to go to work, have the new chapter, I hope you like it =3

 

 

 

 

*** Chapter 8 ***

 

 

 

 

Daryl woke up first, just slowly realizing that he was lying half on top of Paul, in his arms, wearing nothing but his birthday suit. He couldn’t even explain how it happened, but it did happen and now he had no idea how to deal with the aftermath. Did Paul just need someone last night or was it really him he wanted? The fear to come out as gay was still deep-rooted inside of the redneck from the mountains of Northern Georgia, but the desire to be with Paul was just as strong. He rolled on his side and watched the beautiful man next to him. He was deep asleep and looked so peaceful, it made Daryl smile.  
Outside, people were already awake and working, but he just couldn’t bring himself to wake Paul up, but he also couldn’t leave him here all naked.. It was his decision how, when or if he would tell Axel at all.  
Daryl got up quietly, took a cloth and some water to clear up the traces from last night off of his body and then continued with Paul, trying hard to keep his eyes out of his private area and praying that he won’t wake up, but he seemed to be so far gone, Daryl wondered if he was hibernating.   
He managed to get Paul back in his clothes as well and covered him with his poncho. He couldn’t risk anyone to find him in his bed naked. Paul shifted a little and smiled, but wasn’t waking up.   
“Wherever you are, stay there a little longer..” Daryl mumbled and kissed his forehead before he left the tent. 

Daryl breathed in the fresh, chilly air deeply and looked around. He wasn’t really sure how he was feeling, but part of him felt pure happiness. Another part was confused and the part he wanted to just vanish was scared.  
He looked around and spotted his brother. His words still in his head, he decided to go to him with no idea what to say.

Merle was sorting weapons and looked up. “Where you been?” he asked and Daryl shrugged. “Just got up. What’s that?” he pointed to a knife-kind weapon, he couldn’t quite figure out how to use.  
“Idea’s mine, Becky made it. Chick’s got some skills.” Merle said and attached the thing to his arm. “No walker’s comin’ for me no more.” he grinned and Daryl nodded. “Make the best out of the worst, huh? Don’t hurt yourself.”  
“Dick’s lookin’ for Jesus all morning, making a fuss. You found him?”   
Daryl swallowed and looked at his feet. “He’s in my tent. Still asleep.”  
Merle looked up to his little brother, studying him intensely. “So you and Jesus now, hm?”  
Daryl tried to keep his breathing at a slow pace but it wasn’t working so well. Still he found the strength to lock eyes with Merle and mumbled: “What if?”  
“What if?” Merle echoed and there was a moment of silence between the brothers. “Don’t tell me you don’t mind..” Daryl said and Merle stood up. “Tell you what.. I give a damn.”  
“You always knew?”  
“Think I’m stupid? I knew, Dad knew.. Was hard enough to sell you as a loser to everyone as excuse you never had a girl, just to hide that you’re not into ‘em.”  
Daryl looked confused.   
“Ya know what they would’ve done to you.”  
“All the shit talk ‘bout gays was to protect me?”  
“Pff.. Just to spare the trouble.” Merle said but Daryl knew he was lying. “You know.. I don’t like ‘em.. but you’re blood. Now it don’t matter no more. No one gives a fuck if you like dicks.”  
“I like Paul..” Daryl said with a cracked voice and blinked away a tear. He had no idea why his brother’s approval was so important to him, but he felt the weight of decades of hiding his true self from the world falling off his shoulders. “Yeah, that ain’t news. Go have some fun as long as you’re still alive. Got not much left anyway.”

Just in that moment, Daryl saw Paul sneak out of his tent. He looked around, saw him, but looked away immediately and headed into the opposite direction.  
“I.. We’re.. just friends.. I guess..” he mumbled and wiped over his face with the back of his hand. “At least I hope..”   
“Whatever.” Merle said, making his brother understand that he wasn’t up for that kind of talk. “Help me get the guns now, will ya?”  
“Sure..”

While Daryl was happy to have some distraction, Paul had no idea what to do with himself. He woke up fully dressed and alone and was too scared to find out what that meant to go to Daryl and confront him. Maybe he wanted to pretend last night never happened and Paul felt guilty.. He had promised his friend he wouldn’t hit on him and then he took advantage of his weak moment. Daryl was struggling with the situation before and after and he didn’t even say a single word. What felt so perfect last night now seemed to be the worst idea he ever had. He slept with his straight best friend he was also in love with and now he was scared that he could lose him forever. “Paul, you idiot..” he mumbled to himself and kicked a stone. Daryl never talked much about stuff that made him uncomfortable, so Paul decided he would leave it up to him, if he wanted to talk about this or just pretend it never happened. But the way he touched him, how they just haven’t been able to stop kissing.. With every move Daryl made, he felt loved and adored in a way he never knew before. Had he only been imagining that because he wished for it so much? Realizing how much he was already in love with Daryl Dixon, he teared up, but swallowed his emotional outburst down. He couldn’t freak out now, he had to act as normal as possible if he wanted to avoid scaring his best friend away.  
Paul decided to go out on his own, it was way too long that he had some alone time to collect his thoughts. He knew he needed a strong mind when it would come to breaking up with Axel because he knew _him_. But this time, he would do it and he also had a plan B for the worst case.   
Lost in thoughts, Paul kept walking through the woods without heading somewhere in particular. He just enjoyed the scent of nature, the damp earth, the colorful leaves, the silence.. He had completely lost track of time, but he knew that it was early evening, considering the position of the sun. He knew it was time. It was now or never, so he returned to the camp, took a deep breath and entered Axel’s tent.

“Hey..” he greeted quietly. Axel was on his cot, reading a book. Seeing him like that reminded Paul of the things they had in common. He first met him in a library and they got lost in a conversation about a book they both read and loved. Axel was so different back then… Or maybe his true self just wasn’t shining through yet. He put the book aside and got up. “Paul..” he said, worry written all over his face. “Where have you been..”  
“Out. On my own. I needed to think.”  
“Paul..” Axel walked up to his boyfriend and carefully touched his face. Paul let him. “I’m so sorry about yesterday. I didn’t want to hurt you..”  
“I know. And I don’t want to hurt you either, but I have to.. You and I.. it’s just..” he started but Axel interrupted. “No. Before you say something, please give me one last chance.. I promise I make it up to you. I would do anything for you if you would just let me..”  
“I’m sure you mean what you say. But if you really want to do something for me, you have to let me go. Let _us_ go.. What we had is dead. I don’t love you anymore.. for a long time now.. and you know it.”  
“But… it can come back right? Your feelings… you just need time!”  
“Axel. I had time. More than enough. They’re gone.”  
“No..” Axel said and fell on his knees, wrapping his arms around Paul. “Give me one last night. Let me show you.. you will remember..” he said with a shaky voice and started to fumble with Paul’s belt, but he took a step back. “Stop.. please don’t make this worse than it is...” Paul said softly, trying to unwrap himself from the embrace.  
“No.. no I will make it better. It will make all better..” Axel assured and got up. He grabbed Paul by the shoulders and pushed him to the ground. “I’ll make you remember, you’ll thank me for it.”   
His voice had changed from pleading to eager. He ripped Paul’s shirt open and wanted to kiss him, but Paul kicked him in the balls and knocked him out with one hard punch in the face. He was breathing heavily, his heartbeat racing. Axel was unconscious but he didn’t care. He stormed out of the tent, his instinct leading him straight to Daryl. 

Daryl was working on his arrows, when Paul dashed into the tent. He looked up, knowing immediately that something was wrong. Paul was breathing heavily, his shirt was ripped, his hair a mess and his eyes wide open.  
“Paul, what the..” Daryl said and stood up.  
“I.. I tried to break up with him… and he tried to rape me..” Paul said as a matter of fact, still in a state of shock and Daryl’s mind turned blank. “I kill him..” he mumbled and was about to stomp out but Paul held him back. “No.. please just...” his voice broke and he hugged Daryl tightly. Daryl wrapped his arms around his friend and just held him. “It’s okay.. I got ya..” he assured and Paul melted into his strong arms. He knew he didn’t need Daryl to protect him, they both knew. Just now, he needed him close. He needed to be secure in a way only Daryl could make him feel. Paul heard his heart beating fast and remembered how he kind of pressured him into yesterday’s situation. “Daryl… What happened last night.. I.. I’m sorry.. I..” he mumbled against his chest and they parted a little, just enough to be able to look at each other. “Don’t worry ‘bout it..” Daryl said quietly, not letting Paul finish the sentence to spare him from having to admit that it had been a mistake. “Really?” Paul asked, his heart aching a little, “I didn’t mess up our friendship?” Daryl faked a smile. “Nah.. We’re good.” he assured and Paul nodded. “It won’t happen again.” he promised, now more convinced than ever, that Daryl wanted to forget about it as fast as possible. Before Daryl was able to reply, someone pushed through the entrance, making the two men part in a haste. It was Merle.

“Just wanna let you know, Dick’s in the woods, lookin’ for ya. Sent him there so you’re good here.”  
Paul understood and nodded. “Thank you.”   
Merle left without another word but Daryl knew what huge step that was for his brother. Part of Merle had accepted that Daryl was gay and in love with Paul and that was more than he could ever wish for, no matter if he had a chance or not.

“What now? You can’t hide forever.. We gotta do somethin’.” Daryl said. Paul wasn’t looking at him. “I will leave the camp. It’s all prepared. We can’t kick him out and I can’t be near him anymore. I have to move on… I hid some supplies.. enough for two for about two weeks, maybe more.” Now Paul looked up, his eyes finding Daryl’s. “I know it’s selfish but.. I want you to come with me. You don’t have to give me an answer now. I know it is an asshole move to ask you to leave your brother behind but I simply can’t imagine doing this without you. If you decide no, don’t feel bad about it, I understand.. If you decide yes, meet me in front of the camp at dawn. I hate goodbyes, so.. don’t come if you just wanna say good bye.” Paul smiled and left the tent, leaving a speechless Daryl behind.

 

 

***

 

 


	9. "Sorry"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there~ 
> 
> so...I guess the way this story is taking is not so much liked considering the low response to the last chapter? I really hope I can make it up in the future and you will like what I am planning with this story =3 I am always happy and grateful if you leave me your thoughts or opinions because it helps me making the best out of this! 
> 
> Also, soon I will have more time and I always like adding artwork to my stories so.. if you have requests for certain scenes you might like to see as an artwork, let me know and I see what I can do! =D
> 
> I hope you enjoy the chapter and your rest weekend <3 XXX

 

 

 

 

*** Chapter Nine ***

 

 

 

 

 

Daryl needed a moment to process all the information. Paul was going to leave and if he wouldn’t go with him, maybe he would never see him again. 

_I simply can’t imagine doing this without you._

Paul’s words echoed in his head and he peeked outside, seeing his brother sitting by the fireplace with Becky. Merle laughed and she laughed as well. They really got along and Daryl knew he liked her. It looked like a little miracle, but she seemed to like him as well. Everything Daryl knew about hunting, tracking, surviving, he passed on to Becky. The campers weren’t as helpless as in the beginning anymore. This place was as safe as it could be, the walls were finished, guns and supplies were well stocked. Daryl didn’t even need to think twice, he would go with Paul. He knew he wouldn’t be able to be here just one day, not knowing if he was alright. He wouldn’t run into this blindly, Daryl was sure he had planned this well. He said he hid supplies for two to make a start. Paul would never plan all this if he thought there would be another way, so there was no way to talk him out of this. It was either stay without him or go.  
Daryl looked for a piece of paper and a pen and started writing a note. He prepared some stuff and decided to take an early nap, tomorrow would become a tough day.   
While he was trying to fall asleep, he couldn’t ignore his heart, pounding heavy in his chest. Starting tomorrow, he would be alone with Paul. It would be like going on a supply run, just that it would never end. Merle won’t like it, but he would understand. He had to understand. Maybe it was best for the both them, making a new start apart from each other. Maybe that was how they would find their place in this world. 

While Daryl was trying to get some sleep, Paul spent the night in a tree outside of the camp. He had no interest in running into Axel again. There was no way to end this peacefully, he had seen it in his eyes. Axel was in complete denial of reality and before someone got hurt for real, it was better that he was leaving. Maybe, when Axel realized that he was gone for real, he would find his way back to become the decent human being he once was. At least that was what Paul hoped. From his spot, he was able to watch over the camp and he felt good, seeing that everyone was working together, everyone was improving. The campers gained confidence from day to day, they got used to the new world and weren’t as scared as in the beginning anymore. With a strong leader, they would make it and they had a strong leader, even if he might not know it yet. For a moment, he even considered to just leave now. Maybe it was better if he didn’t know how Daryl decided and take the decision from him…  
While Paul was still thinking about it, he stared into the sky and watched the stars until his head was clear from all thoughts. He wasn’t scared to leave, his only fear was to never see Daryl again. He thought back to last night and smiled. No matter if it was a one time thing, no one could ever take that memory from him. Paul would never forget how good his lips tasted, his scent, feeling his body close…  
“Please be there..” Paul whispered into the silence, still staring into the night sky, hoping for a shooting star to make a wish, but no star was willing to fall for the illusion of hope. Paul sighed. The camp was quiet now, everyone was asleep and only the guards were on watch. The night was so peaceful, it was hard to believe that they were in the middle of the apocalypse. But if they weren’t, he probably wouldn’t be sitting in a tree in the middle of nowhere, watching the stars. In the distance, dawn was coming and Paul decided that it was time. He climbed down and sidled off through the trees until he reached the street, where he waited for Daryl until the sun started to rise. Daryl wasn’t coming and Paul waited a little longer until he forced himself to accept, that his friend had decided against him. He took a deep breath, trying to ignore his aching heart and started his journey into the unknown without looking back. It was probably better like this.

When Daryl woke up, it was still quiet in the camp. He left the note on his cot, grabbed his stuff and snuck outside. “What the..” he mumbled when he realized, that it was already almost bright outside. “Fuck.”   
Daryl hurried to a spot of the wall where he could leave the camp without being seen by the guards and sprinted to the place where Paul was supposed to meet him, but he was no where to be seen.  
“No..” Daryl looked around, panic crawling through his veins. Without thinking, he started running up the street, not even knowing if it was the right direction. Paul said he hid stuff, so he just headed into the direction where they found most recently. Daryl was running until his lungs hurt but he couldn’t just give up. He stopped to catch a breath, then he kept running. He passed some fresh killed walkers and knew that must have been Paul’s work. It just had to be. Daryl reached the turn of the road and stopped, breathing heavily. His heart skipped a beat the moment he saw someone walking up the road, just a few hundred feet away from him. It was Paul. Daryl whistled with what felt like his dying breath. His vision was so blurry, he couldn’t even figure out if the other man had stopped or not, but then he saw him coming closer. He was actually running and Daryl kept running, too. Without saying a word Paul jumped into his arms, all limbs wrapped around him, holding on so tightly, Daryl thought he would squeeze him to death, but he couldn’t breathe anyway, so it didn’t matter. He buried his face in the crook of his neck and breathed in the scent of his soft hair, mixed with the leather from his coat. If he never knew what it felt like, loving someone, he knew now for sure. He loved this man with all his heart and had not a single doubt about his decision to go with him.  
“You’re late...” Paul mumbled softly, still clinging to Daryl.  
“You’re fast, asshole..” Daryl replied, still out of breath. He put Paul back on his feet and they looked at each other.  
“Why did you change your mind?” Paul wanted to know, assuming he didn’t want to come at first but Daryl shook his head. “I didn’t. Just overslept...”  
Paul didn’t know what to say, then he laughed. “Really? You sure about this?”  
“Partners in crime, right?” Daryl said and Paul smiled at him. “Right.”

***

Back at Camp Hope, the inhabitants were slowly starting the day. Merle wanted to wake up his brother, but what he found instead was an almost empty tent. Daryl never had much stuff, but all his important things were gone. He looked around and found the note on his cot.

_Hey brother,  
guess I found my balls. You gotta find your heart, yeah you got one, believe it or not. People here look up to you. Don’t mess it up._

Merle looked up, his face looking like a blank page. He left the tent, looked around and found Becky. She had a piece of paper in her hand as well and he understood. She walked up to him the moment their eyes met and whispered: “Paul’s gone...” Merle hold up his note and replied: “Both gone.” “Daryl, too? What now? Should we tell the others? If we take your bike, maybe we..”  
“Nah. Don’t tell ‘em yet.”  
“You wanna let them go?”  
“Gotta.” Merle simply said, stuffed the paper in his pocket and walked away, mumbling: “Ya don’t mess up yourself, lil’ brother..”

***

About two hours later, Daryl and Paul reached the place where the supplies were hidden. They hadn’t talked much the whole way, both too hungry to think clearly. The whole situation still felt unreal, but after a good breakfast, they planned to rest for a moment to decide what to do next.  
Paul had prepared two backpacks, hidden in a woodlot next to a small village. All the way there, they stayed hidden in the shadows, trying not to draw too much attention on them, because walkers were roaming through the streets.  
“Almost there..” Paul whispered. “Good, I’m starvin’.” Daryl replied and waited for his friend to get the backpacks, but Paul came back empty handed.  
“They’re gone.”  
“Ya kiddin’ me?”  
“No… look!” Paul grabbed Daryl’s wrist and pulled him along. All that was left was a mess of leaves and the word “Sorry” written into the ground. “They left this, though.” Paul held up a knife with a bitter smile.  
Daryl looked around and pointed to the ground. “There. One person. Walked into that direction. C’mon. Let’s get our stuff back.” he growled and started following the tracks.

 

 

***

 

 


End file.
